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His Blessed Epiphany (A Regency Holiday Romance Book 9) Page 8
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“Papa, do you think it’s possible I can reform Lord Spaulding?”
“Why would you want to reform him? He’s good as he is.”
“He is a libertine, Papa,” she said sighing. “A rakehell, and I have heard what those men do.”
Her father’s face reddened, and he looked away from her. “Well, that is up to him. I should hope that he will forsake those wild ways once he settles down with you.”
“And if he doesn’t?”
“I wouldn’t worry about that, Fanny. Women shouldn’t bother themselves with such trifling matters.”
“If you think that I am one of those mindless females, Papa, you obviously do not know me.”
“I know you better than anyone else in this life, Fanny. You should also know that I wouldn’t agree for you to marry someone who would treat you ill.”
“I know he won’t raise a hand to me, and I know he would not hurt my feelings, what I do not know is if he will warm another woman’s bed.”
“If you are so concerned with such things, my dear, why don’t you ask him yourself?”
“How?” she asked in a small voice. “Women don’t concern themselves with such matters, well, at least proper young maidens don’t.”
“And you are a proper young maiden, you just think a bit more independently than most, and I must shoulder the blame for that. Your mother wanted you shielded from things in life that I thought you should know about. I wanted you to know that life could be hard, and that you were blessed to have such an idyllic existence. I also wanted you to know that some men—some men can be hard, some men can be cruel, and some men can act like animals. I wanted you to be wise to all of that.”
“So that I would appreciate those men who were good.”
“Aye,” he sighed.
“Do you think I am a hoyden, Papa?”
“You can be a saucy little minx, but you know how to act appropriately when necessary.”
“Miss Duffy told me I was a hoyden, and so did Lady Armscote.”
“Both of those women are brainless twits, Fanny. They do not know how to be a lady like you are. They have no substance to them. As for that odious woman, you needn’t worry. Miss Duffy has been taken care of.”
“You sent her away?”
“No,” he heaved out a heavy sigh. “I…”
“Oh, Papa, I don’t want her under this roof anymore.”
“She is no longer your companion. She shall work with the other servants.”
“For how long? You will take pity on her at some point, Papa. It is inevitable. You are soft when it comes to some women, and you have always been particularly vulnerable when it comes to Miss Duffy. You give her everything she wants, in order to placate her.”
“No, I do not.”
“Yes, you do, Papa,” she said softly. “That woman can wrap you around her pinky finger. All she has to do is start crying, and her vile nature slips away in your eyes, and you cave like a house of cards. You let her get away with far too much.”
“Some would say I have indulged you too much, Fanny.”
“I am your daughter—she is not.”
He sighed. “It makes no difference now. She shall never be part of our lives again. I told her that she had to learn some humility…and so she shall. Do you wish to speak to Felix? Do you wish to marry him?” he asked softly.
She had had time to prepare for this moment. Boxing Day had always been her wedding day in her mind.
“If I don’t marry him, what do you think he will do?” she asked, fear stabbing through her heart. The thought of never seeing Felix again, made her break out in a cold sweat. Seeing him again had resurrected all of her tender feelings for him. Seeing him had made her realize that she hadn’t just been infatuated with him. Realizing that what she had felt had been love, struck fear into her. She knew that if she lost him again, she wouldn’t be able to cope. She had to have him in her life. She had to have him by her side. No other man had interested her because once you were in love no one else could steal your heart away.
“I think he will let his mates whisk him away from us. I fear we shan’t see him ever again.”
“I cannot let that happen, Papa. If I don’t marry him, I shan’t marry anyone else.”
“I thought you might feel that way, Fanny. I…I think that Felix suits you, Fanny. He doesn’t seem at all worried about your hoydenish ways.”
“Then, you do think I am a hoyden.”
He smiled at her and winked. “Only in the best possible way, Fanny. You must seize your own happiness. I cannot do that for you. I only brought happiness to your doorstep. Now you must take charge of your own destiny. Do what will make you happy, not what you think I want you to do.”
That emboldened her. She had made up her mind. She had already lost Felix once. She would not lose him again.
She would marry Felix Grey, and become his baroness.
Chapter Nine
Felix started pacing as soon as Colonel Blessing left the room.
“You are going to ruin that beautiful carpet with all of your pacing,” Lucky said, sighing. “Felix, you are starting to make me nervous, and everyone knows I do not get nervous. Bring your ass to anchor, or I shall try to do it for you.”
“You wouldn’t succeed, mate.”
“Maybe with Freddie’s help, I might.”
“I grant you that one,” Felix said, sighing, and sinking down into a crimson wingback armchair that was most likely the Colonel’s seat of honour.
The vicar sat quietly reading a book. His wife would be fetched when the ceremony was to begin. He looked up from his book, and cast his discerning gaze toward Felix.
“If I might be so bold, Lord Spaulding, how long have you been acquainted with Lady Epiphany?”
Felix cleared his throat. “I suppose you could say that we have known each other for fifteen years or thereabouts. I would have to sit down and recall the first date that we met. She was a girl when we first met and a young lady when last we saw each other. I cannot recall the day we were first introduced offhand.”
“Ah, I see. I didn’t know that you were an old family friend.”
Felix was about to refute that statement, and his words were almost out of his mouth. Colonel Blessing walked into the room, and must have heard enough of the conversation to say, “Indeed he is, Vicar. Why, I consider him to be like the son I never had.”
Now Felix wanted to start pacing again. He didn’t know how to respond to such a high honour. “I thank you, sir,” he said, in a lower tone that he usually didn’t employ. He knew his cheeks were burning red, for he could feel the heat rushing to them.
The Colonel smiled warmly at him. “Fanny should be down momentarily.”
“Good, good,” the Vicar said, jumping up. “Shall we perform the ceremony here?”
“It is Fanny’s favourite room, so I think it shall do. I have also sent a footman to tell your wife to come down.”
“Thank you, my lord,” the vicar said. “Fortunately, I came prepared.”
“Yes, fortunate, indeed,” Colonel Blessing said.
Felix wondered if he could call a halt to the proceedings. Without a word, he strode out of the Library, and made his way to the magnificent oak staircase. He looked up, and caught sight of a vision in red.
Fanny was walking down the staircase with Mrs. Davies by her side. Her eyes connected with his, and she gave him a brilliant smile. Something gave way inside of him. His heart melted. His head spun, and his mouth went dry.
Damnation. She was the most beautiful creature he had ever lied eyes upon. The dress she wore swirled around her in a cloud of crimson silk. Red like some of the rubies he had seen. Red like the ruby and diamond parure he had brought for her, and hadn’t yet presented her with. Shouldn’t he have given it to her before they were wed? Or after? He didn’t know the protocol on such things, and wished he had already given it to her, as it would have made the dress shine ever brighter.
She looked like somethin
g out of a dream. Good God, she truly was his blessing. How could a bastard like him ever live up to deserving her as his wife? He was a bloody rascal, and not nearly good enough for a woman like Epiphany Blessing.
He went to her side, and gave her his arm, as she stepped off the last step. She leaned against him. He watched as Mrs. Davies hurried past them, bustling toward the Library.
“What’s the matter?” she asked softly.
He shrugged his shoulders. “Your father said something to the vicar that affected me deeply. He said that I was like the son he never had.”
“And you are,” she said. “He worried about you so after you left him. I think he aged a few years trying to find out if you had survived the Battle of Waterloo.”
“I lost quite a few good mates that day,” he said, sighing.
“I am terribly sorry, Felix. I feared that I would lose my Papa and you. Hearing that you were both safe brought tears to my eyes. I was ever so relieved when Papa wrote to us to tell us that you were safe—he said that he was tempted to go and see you but he didn’t want to come up against Colonel Elliot again. Mama almost fainted after she found out that Papa had come through it relatively unscathed.”
“Colonel Elliot is no ogre. He helped me a lot, Epiphany. He gave me opportunities that I might never have had, if I hadn’t been assigned to the Angels of Death.”
“Oh, I know. But Papa gives him a chilly reception whenever their paths cross. He has never forgiven Colonel Elliot for taking you from him.”
“You weren’t at the Duchess of Richmond’s Ball?” he asked softly.
“Mama and I were in Ireland at the time. She had wanted to visit what was left of her family there. She told me that she felt as if she needed to see the land where she was born one final time. I didn’t pay any attention to her words that fateful day. I wish I had. It was as if she knew her time with us was growing short. I have three wonderful cousins that still reside there. While we were there, Miss Duffy crept out of her hole and made herself known to us, although I really do wish she hadn’t. Despite Miss Duffy’s presence, we had a lovely long holiday in Ireland, and my mother’s health rallied, and we had a good five years with her after that. We might have missed that fateful event, but Papa was at the Duchess’s Ball and he had to leave early. He said that some of the men had to go to the battlefield wearing their evening costumes. I cannot imagine that. Papa said that some of the officers had never seen combat before and fancied that they would find glory and they only found death. Those poor souls.”
“I wouldn’t know,” he said. “I wasn’t at the ball. And I wish to God I hadn’t been at the battle. I lost too many friends during that little bastard Boney’s last hurrah. I wish he had never escaped from exile. It would have saved us all so much heartache. There is so much that we have to catch up on, isn’t there? We…we have been parted for such a long time, and shouldn’t I court you before we marry?”
She chuckled. “I don’t think Papa has the patience for that. It isn’t as if we are strangers, Felix.”
“He isn’t dying, you know. So there isn’t any rush to be married.”
She smiled at him. “He came to me and told me all of that.”
“He did?” Felix’s face brightened. “I didn’t think he would confess all, but I am so relieved he got it all off his chest. That relieves me from such a burden. I wanted you to know everything before we married. I didn’t want anything to come between us.”
“Aye. He has revealed everything to me. I…I cannot tell you what an immense relief it is to know everything. I am ever so grateful that you came back into our lives, and that you brought your mates with you. Lord Cary has done wonders for Papa. The greatest gift I have received this Season is my father’s good health. I…” her voice grew hoarse with emotion, “I didn’t know how I would go on without him. I know he won’t be around forever, but every moment we have from here on in together, I shall cherish.”
“Then,” he cleared his throat. “Then, you do want to marry me today?”
“Yes,” she whispered. “I don’t think we have to rush into starting married life right away, as you said we…we have just become reacquainted.”
He nodded his head. He understood what she meant, and she was right. The intimate part of their life could be wait. Right now, he just had to adjust to the entire idea of being married, and that he would be no longer free to do whatever the hell he wanted to do.
She reached for his hand. He swallowed thickly. Nervousness rolled through him. He had never been this nervous before. He was going to cock it all up. Somehow, he would ruin what was being built between them. His clumsy manners, his large mouth. Something would go wrong, and his world would come crashing down around him. How could he marry her? Marrying her would make him weak. Right now, he only cared about his mum, and his mates. They all knew how to take care of themselves, and he didn’t have to worry about them ever leaving him. Their love and loyalty could be counted on no matter what he did. But what if it wasn’t the same with Fanny? What if he opened his heart up to her, and she found fault with something he did? He wouldn’t be able to blame her, as he had a habit of ruining the good things that were in his life. Somehow, he would push her away, and he couldn’t bear the thought of it.
“I am not perfect, Fanny. I have a big mouth, I’m not comfortable in this bright and glittering world that gives you such ease.”
“You might not be perfect, Felix, but neither am I, and you know how to do more things than I do. I am a pampered princess. I don’t even know how to wash my own clothes. You know how to do all of that. You know how to do the things in life that quite baffle me, and while I am well-travelled, you are as well. We are equals in that regard, aren’t we? We…we shall embark upon this next journey of our lives together, and go into it with our eyes wide open. Ever since we met, I knew there was no other man for me.” He looked away from her. “Do you not feel the same way?” she asked, her voice faint.
He shrugged his shoulders, and she tried to draw her hand away, he wouldn’t let her and held her hand firmly within his. “I don’t know how to feel, Fanny. I am afraid.”
“You, afraid?” she laughed. “You are the fearless Felix Grey. I have never seen you show fear. Papa said you were the bravest man he knew.”
“Nothing else frightens me as much as knowing that I might lose what I love.”
She smiled at him. “You won’t ever lose me, Felix. We are going to be married, and that is for life.”
“Not for some people.”
“For us it will be. I want us to have a marriage like the one my parents had. They were the perfect couple.”
“I am quite certain they had their bumps in the road as well. No one can have a perfect life. I don’t think it exists.”
She shook her head. “You have become a cynic, Felix. After the charmed life you have led, I expected more.”
“Charmed life?” he grunted. “I don’t think I can agree with that. I have had my fair share of good fortune, but I wouldn’t say I’ve led a charmed existence.”
“I didn’t mean to offend you.”
He sighed. “I know. I suppose it’s better if you didn’t know about parts of my life. I wouldn’t want to stain the ideal you hold of me. Given time, I am certain I will fall from your grace, but for today, I shall try to be the man you want me to be.”
“You only have to be the man you are, Felix. I fell in love with that man. I loved you back when I knew you as my father’s manservant. Now, you are a lord…you are a Peer of the Realm, but I would have wanted you even if you weren’t.”
“Well, then, Lady Epiphany, why don’t we go and become man and wife?”
“There isn’t anything in this world that I want more,” she said, taking his offered arm, and walking with him toward their destiny.
Chapter Ten
Felix’s life had taken a drastic turn.
He hoped it was for the better, and not for the worse. He was now, God help him, a married man. It was a li
fe sentence, and one there was no way he could maneuver out of.
Mixed emotion filled him during the entire ceremony, right up to the point where they kissed to seal the union. Once his lips touched hers, something had washed over him. A force so strong that it had startled him. He had never felt such a thing before, and he had kissed plenty of women.
The bright eyed innocent that he had just married had nothing to compare the kiss to, though he saw her a little shaken after they had kissed as well. Everything was in order, and the vicar was preparing to leave. He thought that he would stay as well, but according to the vicar he and his wife could make it back to the vicarage without incident even under the cloak of darkness.
Felix’s friends congratulated him, and started to prepare to leave.
“You can’t think to leave now?”
“We are used to traveling at night, and I told you I don’t ever break a promise to Iris. True, we might arrive at Evesham Hall after everyone has retired, but I’ll be back before morning, and that’s what counts. As for your lady love, I think my healing touch has sorted her out. She will be fine, you needn’t fret, and…” he lowered his voice, “if you would like to have your wedding night tonight, you can,” Lewis said.
Felix groaned. He didn’t really want to know that. “Are you quite certain?”
“Oh, aye. I think the fall just rattled her. As it would do to anyone in a similar situation. She is none the worse for wear, and it was minor enough that my touch…well, I think she is as healthy as you and I, now.”
Damn, Lewis’s healing touch. He had always suspected that Lewis had that ability and now he had it confirmed. The blasted bugger was a miracle worker. His witch blood had always done more good than harm, and that healing ability of his had saved their lives many times during the wars. Alas, Lewis wasn’t all seeing, and sometimes tragedy struck. They had lost men who were beyond his healing abilities, and he knew that that had scarred Lewis. Losing his first wife and the child they had shared had also shaped him into the man he was today. He had been by Lewis’s side through it all, and their bonds of friendship would never break.